a few of our patients have weight problems. with those who are underweight we can supplement their food with protein shakes but the overweight are more difficult to treat as they’re usually sneaking food between meals.
one such secret gorger is ollie, who eats double helpings of meat at every meal which could mean bacon for breakfast, maybe steak and chips for lunch and a slab of shepherds pie for dinner. his fridge looks like a mini charcuterie and he set the fire alarms off once by using a george foreman grill balanced on the toilet cistern to whip up a brace of chops for a midnight snack.
he orders in ribs and burgers and “meat lovers pizza” when he needs a snack and being a good aussie bloke, washes it all down with a couple of schooners of beer. he probably couldn’t get away with this in a regular hospital but our patients are encouraged to view the gimcrack as a hotel with medical assistance and ollie wants to be master of his own destiny.
he’s already finding it hard to move around much and quite frankly, if he fell over I’m not sure our mechanical lifter is strong enough to get him back up so drastic measures may be called for. he needs to lose about 50 kilos in a hurry so I’m sending off for this authentic medical treatment first thing tomorrow…….