self fellatio is not for the elderly

continuing my recent research on preventing prostate cancer, nursemyra has further good news to impart to her male readers

Countering prostate cancer Over the past few years, several journals have published studies showing that the more ejaculations the better. ‘High ejaculation frequency is related to decreased risk of total prostate cancer.’ (The Journal of the American Medical Association).

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female readers should not feel left out. nursemyra’s research will always include the fairer sex

Fighting aging One thing’s for sure: ‘Use it or lose it’ is literally true. For example, postmenopausal women often suffer from ‘vaginal atrophy,’ which is what it sounds like and can lead to all sorts of complications like urinary tract infections. What’s one way to prevent it? More intercourse.

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and by now I’m sure you’ve all heard about the study that claims swallowing semen is good for depression. I’ll be sure to pass that information on to my patients at the next sex ed class I run. though I won’t be advocating they take up this position to do so, the O H & S committee would prefer me to hand out specimen jars rather than encourage dangerous activities.

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image sourced here

another all too common ailment in my elderly patients is osteoporosis. diet, heredity and exercise all have a role to play in preventing its onset but did you know that breastfeeding also helps?

 lactation protects against premenopausal breast cancer and osteoporosis (ABA 2003)

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I don’t think this lovely lass has breastfed any babies yet though no doubt there are a few of my male readers who would like to help her prepare for the event…

Published in: on December 30, 2007 at 8:10 am  Comments (18)  

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18 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. So much to do and so little time …… I think I’ll start with a cuppa.

  2. I think her milk might be worth tasting in a cup of coffee. I wouldn’t drink it neat though. Not rich enough. I hope your medical advice is widely publicised.

  3. wow how bendy are they???…. co-incidentally Iam starting yoga classes next month ;-)

  4. I would suggest the contrary, good nurse. Self-fellatio by the elderly might just be more pleasurable without all those bothersome teeth to worry about.

  5. I’m already well aware of the health benefits to high ejaculation frequency, and have incorporated it into my lifestyle since I was 14!

    Heh, is there any such thing as TMI on the Gimcrack blog? I think not.

  6. I wonder about the people who do these studies. Are they genuine scientists concerned for the well being of humanity or just sex-starved pervs who aren’t getting enough.

  7. hmmm…. since I’m studying the studies as well I guess I’ll say “genuine scientists” so I don’t get labelled as a perv :-)

  8. If I could autofellate, I wouldn’t leave the house. Someone would call me on the phone and I’d be like, “Mmmm hmmmmm?”

  9. They need to make that whole “high ejaculation” thing more well known. That way when parents walk in on their teenage son shaking hands with the governor of love, he can just yell “Would you excuse me, please? I’m trying to fight prostate cancer in here!” It would save the world a lot of embarrassing tales.

  10. “the governor of love”… good one :)

  11. Another public service announcement! Thanks for the tip and I must do something this year to prevent atrophy…

  12. I’m all about the public service announcements :-)

  13. Sorry, but this reminds me of the old joke:

    Why does a dog lick its own genitalia?

    Because he can!

    (Doing my best to fight cancer on a Monday afternoon)

  14. hey pushbiker. best of luck with the fight. that’s not a good start to the year, hope things get better for you soon

    *big hug*

  15. But I thought you said it was good for me.

    While sex with a partner is always preferable, the complications of life frequently make it impossible. Lack of privacy due to the presence of teens is just one of dozens of reasons I could name.

    Besides, done right it can be quite enjoyable.

    I’d better stop right there.

  16. “quite enjoyable”?

    I think any guy who was bendy enough to self fellate would make sure it was VERY enjoyable :-)

  17. Wait, no….I meant…..

    Sigh.

    Oh,never mind :)

  18. [...] blogger, adjusting her corset while logging on to a travel website. “I just love all those cute little figurines and stuff. Do you think they’d let me make a few plaster [...]


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