sweeten your man juice

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many men complain that they don’t get enough oral sex. maybe they’re dating the wrong kind of women or maybe they don’t have the right kind of sperm appeal. some women might need a little persuasion before they’ll put objects in their mouths, especially if they have the wrong idea about germs. don’t think about that too much, mouths have way more germs than penises do but it doesn’t seem to stop men from wanting to go there

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the good folk at Semenex have some advice which may or may not help persuade a reluctant female to sample the goodies

About an hour or so before bed, ejaculate at least a time or two before taking Semenex.

  1. Shortly before bed, pour one serving of Semenex into a lidded container of 6 ounces of water (or any other desired potable liquid or beverage).
  2. Close the container lid and shake contents vigorously (that’s right, “shaken, not stirred”). Then drink.

Pineapple; Broccoli; Banana; Celery; Strawberry; Fructose; Cinnamon; Ginger; Nutmeg; Citric Acid; Vitamins B6, B12,
and E; Calcium; Magnesium; Creatine; Selenium; Zinc; and Chlorophyll

well that seems pretty simple doesn’t it? and according to “Rex” it tastes a lot like liquid pumpkin pie. that would be kind of like the pureed lunch we feed to our geriatrics then.

nursemyra likes to see sperm as a pearl necklace. after all that effort, it’s nice for two lovers to lie back and admire the results for a while, inhale the aroma and think of the sea. I’ve never thought of adding it to food but other people have. here’s a dressing recipe for that tossed salad your in-laws asked you to bring to their barbecue

In a screw-top jar combine lemon or lime juice; honey; oil; cinnamon, allspice, or cardamom; paprika and your delicious spunk. Cover and shake well. Refrigerate the dressing until serving time. Shake well before serving. Makes about 3/8 cup (six tablespoon servings). Shake well before using. Add eggs if required

don’t know that I fancy a salad after reading that but I’m always up for a lollipop

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Published in: on March 29, 2008 at 8:41 am

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26 Comments Leave a comment.

  1. On March 29, 2008 at 9:54 am Beaverboosh Said:

    I dip my tadger in good old canadian maple syrup to sweeten things up! It’s a bit sticky and smells like the french canadian bush, but always delights.

  2. On March 29, 2008 at 10:32 am Gorilla Bananas Said:

    If you add peppermint you could try brushing your teeth with it.

  3. On March 29, 2008 at 11:06 am Frontier Former Editor Said:

    Maybe it’s a good thing my state isn’t complying with Dept. of Homeland Security driver’s license guidelines so I can’t get a passport or board an airline flight . . . .

  4. On March 29, 2008 at 11:54 am Abbadon Said:

    I’d be afraid that the good folks at Semenex have seen the “Cooking With Cumm” website and decided to “fortify” their product…

  5. On March 29, 2008 at 12:46 pm daisyfae Said:

    there is a connection between ‘diet’ and ‘taste’. not that i’ve sampled thousands, but asparagus and garlic are detectable.

    and for gals who really don’t like the taste, there are some festive potions and lotions. they warm, and chill… a friend with a fondness for the peppermint variety would melt at the suggestion that i’d like to “bounce a couple of things off him over a cold one”…

  6. On March 29, 2008 at 1:47 pm tobymarx Said:

    very amusing. years ago, when i had lots of sex, i was told by various women that my semen tasted sweet. who knows? there was far more salt than sugar in my diet.

  7. On March 29, 2008 at 1:54 pm Lizza Said:

    The taste of liquid pumpkin pie isn’t something that will encourage the recalcitrants to take up this activity.

  8. On March 29, 2008 at 3:50 pm renalfailure Said:

    What a coincidence. Other people like to see semen as a pearl necklace too.

  9. On March 29, 2008 at 4:34 pm 70steen Said:

    It gives a whole new meaning to a tossed salad!! Can’t seeing me introducing it into my cooking routines along with drinking your own urine (didn’t I see that ’serving suggestion’ on here too once??) ….. eeewwww

  10. On March 29, 2008 at 5:54 pm azahar Said:

    “not that i’ve sampled thousands, but asparagus and garlic are detectable”

    I was going to mention asparagus … and garlic for sure comes out of every pore in your body. What about curry?

  11. On March 29, 2008 at 6:22 pm thordora Said:

    Get the right angle, and no one tastes a thing. :)

  12. On March 29, 2008 at 7:43 pm Ghosty Said:

    Allow me to add my own, homegrown advice: avoid dairy products like milk and cheese (make your own joke) as well as the garlic and asparagus. And, if you know you have a date coming up in the next day or so, indulge in sugary treats like pastries or even some candy. Who says oral sex isn’t fattening? :)

  13. On March 29, 2008 at 10:11 pm nursemyra Said:

    oooh ghosty, I can see you’ve put some thought into this :-)

  14. On March 29, 2008 at 10:39 pm 70steen Said:

    awwww how considerate is Ghosty ??
    NM you beat me to it (but as it is your site… :-) )

  15. On March 29, 2008 at 11:30 pm Uncle Keith Said:

    I have it on good authority that my manly issue tastes like apple jelly. In fact, I “cum” with a guarantee. If my offering doesn’t taste like apple jelly, I’ll give you five dollars.

  16. On March 29, 2008 at 11:31 pm nursemyra Said:

    hahaha that’s your best comment yet.

  17. On March 30, 2008 at 12:20 am gullybogan Said:

    Hang on… girls do what?

    How long has this been going on?

    I’ll bet they got the idea from the internet.

    Someone has to stop that Internet; it’s destroying civilisation as we know it.

  18. On March 30, 2008 at 1:09 am Ricardo Said:

    I will rip the lungs out of any cook who uses spunk as an ingredient And will do so with my bare hands. LOL!

  19. On March 30, 2008 at 1:13 am nursemyra Said:

    hear that cooks?

    :-)

  20. On March 30, 2008 at 2:37 am turnbaby Said:

    Why would I want to waste any?

  21. On March 30, 2008 at 2:42 am Lord Likely Said:

    My ennobled ejaculate is so damned tasty, that I have started a successful sideline filling up jars with my succulent man-batter, and flogging it to shops up and down the land.

    I am nothing if not a Jack (off) of All Trades.

  22. On March 30, 2008 at 3:06 am nursemyra Said:

    hi turnbaby, welcome to the gimcrack I think I’ve seen you on matt-man’s blog ;_)

    lord likely: you are incorrigible and in dire need of a spanking. charter a jet immediately!

  23. On March 30, 2008 at 1:30 pm ~m Said:

    Mmmm . . . it’s sounds ’spunkalicious’.
    I’ll have to pass on the salad today and go for the raw oysters, thank you.
    ~m

  24. On March 30, 2008 at 3:24 pm Frontier Former Editor Said:

    Makes me wonder about all those 7-11 ‘Big Gulps’ I used to drink . . .

  25. On April 1, 2008 at 6:06 am Alex L. Said:

    I’m never eating out again, ever, salad dressing… eugh!

    It makes me wonder if it works both ways, whether the ladies diet would effect the taste of her, fluids.

  26. On April 1, 2008 at 6:30 am nursemyra Said:

    vegetarians say so….

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