One of my favourite food groups is shiraz. But my body only allows me two glasses a day because I’m one of those people who get drunk on very little alcohol. Three glasses and I’d be falling off my walker and spraying urine round the room like the patients I lock in the cellar lovingly care for.
so how come other people can down a couple of bottles and still be standing? Is it because they’re bigger than me or more experienced at grog swilling?
Michael Deakin thinks it’s because our bodies contain two types of tissus – those that absorb alcohol and those that don’t. Neither fat nor bone will absorb alcohol so much depends on the total weight of the remaining tissue. This “reduced weight” can be difficult to calculate but if you’re a 70 kilo man perhaps 48 of those kilos will absorb what you’re drinking. As a slim woman I might only have 25 kilos working for me.
Have a look at the guide below to see what your healthy weight should be.
Then the way to calculate approximately what your “reduced weight” will be is to weigh yourself and compare your actual weight with what you should weigh. Take the lower figure and multiply it 68% if you are a man and 55% if you are a woman.
wine rack bra found at Gizmodo
This is what Michael Deakin calls the Mathematics of Getting Drunk. I’ve already had my allotted two glasses tonight so the math is temporarily beyond my capabilities but I’m not about to start spraying urine any time soon. Speaking of the urge to piss, here’s a cute little tutorial on how to do it while sporting Morning Wood***
*** thanks Mark for sending me this.