improve your sperm count the manly way

In 2005 www.abc.net.au reported on a study about the effects of pornography on sperm***

Paul_Avril_-_Les_Sonnetts_Luxurieux by Avril

“Looking at pornographic images of men and women together can increase the quality of a man’s sperm, a new study suggests. The effect is based on an evolutionary process observed in animals known as sperm competition.

Kama_Sutra_-_37

Males ejaculate more sperm, or sperm of better quality, when the risk of sperm competition [the probability that a female will mate with more than one male] is high.

man-wig

Research now shows that just looking at an image of another man in action is enough to register as a case of sperm competition, causing a compensatory adjustment in the viewer’s semen

yul

I don’t know about my male readers but looking at this early photograph of Yul Brynner certainly increases my desire to check out the quality of freshly produced sperm. You know the drill…. bring your specimen in its original container to nursemyra’s Thursday morning clinic for a free  personal evaluation……

lab technician

lab technician on stand by

*** I first read about this research in How Sex Works by Dr Sharon Moalem


Published in: on June 20, 2009 at 8:20 am  Comments (45)  

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45 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Given the cost of health care these days, your offer of a free examination is quite generous.

  2. Playing wheelbarrow with your back hunched like that gentleman in your top pic will lead to trouble. I trust that your Thursday clinic includes advice as to posture and deportment.

  3. I think my sperm probably needs a zimmer frame now – tee hee

  4. i’m thinkin’ uncle keith must have some seriously potent sperm…

  5. I’ll never watch the magnificent seven the same way again…

  6. ‘Males ejaculate more sperm, or sperm of better quality, when the risk of sperm competition [ the probability that a female will mate with more than one male ] is high.’

    Ahem, if any male out there is struggling with a low sperm count I am only too happy to offer my assistance :lol:

    P.S. My ‘fee’ is on a sliding scale – depending on the attractiveness of your woman :wink:

  7. Yul was one of the hottest men to ever grace our planet, especially after he went bald.

  8. That’s Yul Brenner? But he has hair on his….head

  9. But who can compete with Mr. Man Wig?

  10. Pornography has no effeckt on my sperm.

    Heck, I dont think my sperm evn look at th stuff.

    • Come over here and say that Joey

  11. And you ladys are outta luck.

    Im pretty sure Yul Brynner was a Pharoah.

  12. Yul Brynner eh? very nice.

  13. Hmm, that explains why – - – hmmm – never mind – - -

  14. I’ll see what the wife has to say about this… Wish me luck.

  15. So, this is biology’s way of saying, “my sperm can beat up your sperm”?

  16. Does that mean that it is really women who need to be having mutiple sex partners. I always thought that was really the case.

  17. Sperm envy!! the most powerful reproduction cause known to man … speaking from experience here ;-)

  18. Well I always knew that there was competition with us males but who knew the effects went this deep?

    Is that the lad tech at the gimcrack?

  19. It’s no secret I’ve practically got a hard on for Aussie chicks, so I’ll be there. Shit, I’m ready to populate the entire western world right now. Let’s go!

    • Only “practically”? well I suppose it’s better than “possibly”…..

      • You prefer impractically? I can do whatever you want. I’m flexible.

    • An Australian nurse wif a figure aesthetickle,

      Made a proposal not quite hypothetickle:

      That Atlas bring sperm to her institute medickle.

      But Atlas’s hard-on was jus theoretickle.

      • I’m feeling the deflation

      • Joey arrived at Nurse Myra’s, elated

        “Strip down and get naked!” Nurse Myra dictated

        And laughed once she saw what it was she awaited

        Joe’s ego and pecker, both small and deflated.

    • Atlas said, “Dang it! My hard-ons CONCRETE,

      And not just a friggin abstracktion!”

      Then, off to Nurse Myras, he did hit th street,

      Which put his poor peckr in tracktion.

      • “I’m here and I’m ready,” said Joe, “let’s have fun!

        I’m rearin’ to go, to shoot off my gun!”

        And then, with Nurse Myra’s last button undone,

        Joe squealed, “No not you! I’m here for your son!”

    • Atlas, th wannabe world-populator,

      Has so many pracktickle issues,

      Since surely a chronick all-day masturbator,

      Can impregnate nothin but tissues.

  20. There once was a man from Racine,
    Who invented a fucking machine,
    Concave or convex,
    It would serve either sex,
    And was remarkably easy to clean.

    • Strangely enough I just referenced that very limerick in a post I’m finishing but the version I had was “with adjustments for thos in between.”

      I think it’s the sassy Dr. Susan Block who describes how her husband rises to the task when she arranges for him to watch her being done by another man, incidentally. Of course, some couples would have complications with this method.

  21. There once was a young man named Larry

    Who swore that he never would marry.

    He watched porn galore

    ‘Til his eyes were all sore

    And both of his palms were quite hairy.

  22. Somone once offerd Yul Brynner some porn,

    And Yul said, “Now dont make me laugh!”

    But when in sheer silk was Anne Baxter adornd,

    His serpent turnd inta a staff.

  23. Yul Brynner liked homunculettes.

    He’d fuck ‘em then smoke cigarettes.

    At the end of the night

    He locked them up tight

    In cages, just like they were pets.

  24. Homunckulettes in cages were

    Yul Brynners statud quo.

    Then a midget Moses told him:

    “Let my people go!”

    • Ummm … “statud quoski?”

      Somone set th Gimcrack up wif a PREVIEW funcktion!

      • Joey no one would have ever noticed you made a typo, believe me

  25. Stay far back from Yul Brynner’s stinger.

    He’ll blast you just like a gunslinger.

    He wasn’t that choosy

    He’d screw any floozie

    Unless the bitch looked just like Klinger.

  26. Th phenomenon “sperm competition,”

    Is far from a mere superstition.

    Just watch othrs fun,

    And see if yer gun,

    Aint shootin top-grade ammunition.

  27. Nothing I can say would be worthy of this thread.

    • Nor me silverstar. I step out the door for a coupla hours and Joey brings his homunculette over for a party with Atlas Cerise. I think they raided our drugs cabinet while they were here too…..

  28. We don’t need your cabinet

    We don’t need your drugs

    Our addiction’s much stronger:

    Homunculette hugs

  29. I don’t have a limerick; sorry to let the team down.

    Is the corollary of this that if you *don’t* want to impregnate a chick, *don’t* fuck her while watching your mate screw her sister? Cos, you know, if that’s the case, i wish someone had told me this earlier…

  30. Yul looks exhausted.
    Do you have the earlier event pics ?


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