how about these puppies?

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a couple of weeks ago I mentioned that one of my coworkers has been attending a fertility clinic. today she announced the good news that a little gimcracker is on the way and also asked if nursemyra had any pertinent advice.

as an advocate of breastfeeding I asked nurseincubator about the state of her nipples. a thorough inspection revealed pale tipped rosebuds of the inverted type. this is not really a problem, nature will most likely provide a pleasing popout effect when the time comes. we then had a conversation about ice cubes, pasties, nipple rouge, clamps, piercings and foreplay before we remembered there was an embryo present and a couple of constipated clients awaiting enemas…..

I think nurseincubator will do just fine in the breastfeeding department so let’s keep Dr. Dewee’s advice between you and me:

starting in the seventh month, a pregnant woman should suckle a young but sufficiently strong puppy to toughen and accentuate her nipples to prepare for the future assaults of the child

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nursemyra’s nipples are always at attention so just for a change I might decorate them with “A kind of new and stylish product” from our old friends at sz-wholesale. tassles are nice too. I wonder how much practice this manouvre takes?

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Published in: on November 14, 2007 at 6:39 am  Comments (14)  

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14 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I am practicing now for my Christmas party 😉

  2. standing ovation! i like this one so much, that i laugh out loud in the office!! 😉

    way to go girl! 😉

    *i’m still sick indeed!*

  3. What happens to the puppy afterwards?

  4. Getting them to spin isn’t that difficult, from what I understand; jsut some good knetic energy will get them rotating. The trick is getting them to spin in opposite directions. I knew a girl who could do it … it takes, shall we say, “ample” talent to get things moving in the right directions.

  5. Yes, but where do you draw the line between ample talent and ample milk production?

  6. Should’nt the puppy at least buy her dinner first?

  7. Looking at that first pic……makes my back hurt.

  8. “Future assaults of the child?” What, like if he comes at you with a knife?

  9. I am also ‘standing to attention’.

  10. The puppy thing is very disturbing! What was that doctor smoking?

    The nipple tassles are a nice touch and something to look forward to.

  11. Tura Satana twirled her tassels in opposite directions in Irma La Douce. That effort created a huge trouser affray in a young Archie.

  12. a trouser affray? archie, you are priceless x

  13. and SIX nipple clamps????

  14. […] wait there’s more….. remember Dr Dewee’s advice about letting a puppy suckle on nipples to toughen […]


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