beggars, buggars and choosers

there existed in 18th century Scotland a secret sex society called Beggar’s Benison. new members were required to participate in some strange initiation ceremonies.

The Recorder and two Remembrancers prepared the Novice in a closet, by causing him to propel his Penis until full erection. When thus ready he was escorted with four puffs of the Breath-Horn before the Brethren or Knighthood, and was ordered by tiiQ Sovereign to place his Genitals upon the Testing* Platter, which was covered with a folded white napkin, The Members and Knights two and two came round in a state of erection and touched the Novice Penis to Penis.

after reading an amourous passage from the song of Solomon, port would be drunk and sashes and medals awarded followed by the pledge “May your prick and purse never fail you”

king charles 1 was said to have kept company with several of the Beggar’s Benizen’s members and allegedly gave the knights a wig made from the pubic hair of his mistress. king george 1V also was rumoured to have donated his mistress’s pubic hair to the Order and new initiates were required to add to the collection with hairs from their own conquests.

 

at gatherings the members read aloud passages from “Fanny Hill – Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure”, and then ejaculated together on a special plate.

(Fanny Hill by Becat)

at the gimcrack we run a “Night Owl’s supper club” for patients who want to carry on socialising after the diversional therapist goes home. yesterday evening Mr W was a little hyped up with all the excitement and took a tumble while reaching for the jatz crackers. night staff whisked him off to the bigger hospital up the road where doctors confirmed a broken hip. that’s him out of action for the next six weeks. what a shame – he’d only just joined the supper club that night.

in all the drama, his toupee slipped off and was left behind. there is absolutely no truth in the rumour that it was a merkin created by daisyfae’s recent bikini wax