a handy way to measure your penis

throw away that unreliable ruler. toss the tape measure. here’s the original way to measure your member

“The virile member, to please women, must have at most a length of the breadth of twelve fingers, or three handbreadths, and at least six fingers, or a hand and a half breadth.

There are men with members of twelve fingers, or three hand-breadths; others of ten fingers, or two and a half hands. And others measure eight fingers, or two hands. A man whose member is of less dimensions cannot please women.”

after you’ve done the hand measurement you can verify your findings with the Final Say though it might not be as much fun as having a partner wrap their hands around your member.

this young lady from Modern Mechanix would have great difficulty in getting her hands around anything. as for height, there was a time when “professional englishmen” were the tallest europeans but they have since been superseded by the dutch

lower class frenchies were at the bottom of the height list but that doesn’t bother them at all because they’re top of a more important list now

Published in: on October 1, 2008 at 8:54 am  Comments (21)  

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21 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Well, whoever write that mitten handcuffs thing should be given a cuff on the jaw with a wet beaver! It’s the *Royal* Canadian Mounted Police, eh? Did you know they’re also known as the Queen’s Cowboys? They always get their man.

  2. Ack! wrote

  3. Three handbreadths? I must have very big hands, that must be it.

  4. so that whole thing about measuring horses in “hands”? i thought they were talking about height… wow…

  5. That woman looks like she’s about to bitch slap someone with those gloves…..and like it!

  6. I *accidentally* stumbled across some porn the other night and it featured a black guy with a really huge penis giving it to some poor “housewife.” Every time I try to lay this stereotype to rest it gets reaffirmed. Surely, you can’t deny that genetics has something to do with this? It’s a tricky debate. If you acknowledge that this rather flattering stereotype is rooted in truth, must you then acknowledge that some negative stereotypes must also be true? It’s a slippery slope!

  7. Nurse Myra,

    Thank you for stopping by our site!
    While the French may have the biggest members, we here at postapenis.com can confirm statistically that Spanish people love drawing penises the most.
    Seriously. Almost half our submissions come from Latin America.
    Thanks again!

    your site is pretty amusing 🙂

  8. Just measured MY HANDS and 3 hand breadths is 12″ There must be lot of very unsatisfied women about.

  9. I’ve just measured my ……. oh never mind ……. [ can I just use pinkies? ……]

  10. I have teeny, tiny hands, and no man I’ve ever met is three handbreadths long. Much less bigger manly hands. However, I’ve never met a penis that is too small. Too large? Once, but that may just have been my inexperience at the time.

  11. I am going to need to try this out.

  12. Flaccid or erect? *walks of whistling too all the girlsh Ived luffed beefour*

  13. I know whose hands and fingers I’d want doing the measuring…

  14. I’m going to guess Davey Copperfield or some such pretidigitator- hey, those gloves look like they could prevent some activities and what’s the deal with India on the “important list?” Three hands equals just twelve fingers, right? I’m hoping the thumbs stay out of this… they are the real deal breakers.

    Lef Tandy

  15. Vapour: if you weren’t a continent away I’d be demanding a right to measure

    Renalfailure: ? (blushing hopefully)

  16. Mark: when I was researching this piece I couldn’t find any reference to thumbs so I agree with you. the thumbs stay out of the equation

  17. Three hand breadths… wow, either men have gotten smaller or guys back then had really small hands.

  18. There are many ways to please a woman … Thank God!

  19. care to enumerate?

  20. Yip sure would’ve been handy if I resided in Ausand ahfreeka

  21. do you talk as you write? I want to hear your accent. why don’t you start a radio blog or do a podcast…

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