all that glisters…..

according to the White Powder Gold homepage their product has been tested by the Department of Materials Characterization at a prominent English University.

quack-treatment

“We would like to point out that since only a handful of human beings know how to produce a substance such as a white powder gold , the residue found at crop circles strongly suggests that they have an extra-terrestrial origin.”

Well that’s good enough for me, I just have to find out more about this wondrous stuff which is also known by the name “Spittle of God”

do-not-spit

“It was called the ‘Spittle of God’ — not the word of God, but the spittle. Others referred to it as the semen of the father in heaven. (Putting the white powder in water doesn’t result in it dissolving. Instead, it forms a gelatinous suspension, and looks very much like a vial of semen.)”

murakami-lonesome-cowboy

image from here

Some claim that it was the white powder of gold which allowed Jesus his many gifts.

carpetlayer

These gifts include:  perfect telepathy, the ability to know good and evil when it’s present, and to project thoughts into another person’s mind.  There is also the ability to levitate, or to walk on water.  By excluding all external magnetic fields (including the Earth’s gravity), the white powder of gold takes one beyond the four dimensional space time continuum, and the individual becomes a fifth dimensional being.

make-our-men-fit

all I can say is… wow….

Published in: on February 14, 2009 at 8:38 am  Comments (26)  

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26 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I find myself very interested in the carpet laying tool for reasons far too complicated to go into now ……

  2. So basically Nurse Myra, this outfit is selling dried god spunk which has special magical powers.
    Is it snorted or shot up or just sprinkled on your weeties?

    Daddy Papersurfer – that’s a Roberts Super Senior power stretcher – the biggest, baddest stretcher known to human kind.

  3. What I love most is what’s written at the bottom of the page, it’s the only truthful thing there – and they put it in my favourite font too (chicago)

    The King

    DISCLAIMERS: Nothing on this web site is meant to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease or condition. Neither White Powder Gold, nor any of its owners, employees or agents will be held liable for any use of this product, whatsoever. No warranty is expressed or implied for any merchantability of fitness for any purpose whatsoever. If, for any reason you are dissatisfied , return the product within 30 days for a prompt and cheerful refund of the purchase price only.
    THIS PRODUCT HAS NOT BEEN EVALUATED BY THE FDA.

    I like the words at the top too: “Forged in Fire” (Jesus must have had boiling balls)

  4. “….to project thoughts into another person’s mind”

    i do this out loud, often telling gents “you want me, you just don’t know it yet…”.

    not particularly effective in the line at the grocery store. maybe some white powdered gold dried god-spunk woulde help?

  5. Dried God semen? Does this prove God is actually a man?

  6. Yes indeedy.

  7. Myra, I want the five minutes of my life back that I wasted surfing that site. *snort* You can do better than that for us! 🙂

  8. Jesus was one of the X-Men apparently. Did St. Peter have retractable claws?

  9. I have the ability to know good and evil when it’s present but just can’t master levitation .. how frustrating is that ?? 😉

  10. “We would like to point out that since only a handful of human beings know how to produce a substance such as a white powder gold…”

    Pfft! It looks like semen? I can produce that on a daily basis. But as far as I know, no-one who’s consumed it has gone inter-dimensional…

  11. Have you checked back with ALL your previous girlfriends?

    🙂

  12. i think i’m pretty good at recognizing good. even if i take it for granted sometimes. it’s my inability to always recognise evil that scares me.

  13. I’ve lost faith in my ability to do either. People can be so changeable. now I just go with my gut instinct and hope for the best

  14. ‘the white powder of gold takes one beyond the four dimensional space time continuum, and the individual becomes a fifth dimensional being.’

    I must of missed that part of the bible… or is that after Jesus and Paul watch ‘star trek 4’.

  15. I take it all back, these guys are clearly huge Stargate fans – take a look at the image top right – looks light a Gou’ald mothership to me. And they mention humans being used as slaves in the alien mining operations…

    http://www.whitepowdergold.com/frameormus.html

    the “Adams Family” link is a bit tongue in cheek too methinks. Nursemyra, when you do return to our dimension, give us a call. I’d be out there too but the procedure involving the Reverend’s err ‘White Gold’ is a little off-putting!

    The King

  16. Perhaps if he baked it in a cake first you might find it a little more palatable?

  17. What? No jokes about the “coming of christ”? Too obvious, I suppose.

  18. Yes, but can you buy it on-line?

  19. .. or in a line?

  20. God’s spittle…mano that sounds like some powerful stuff.

  21. >>Have you checked back with ALL your previous girlfriends

    Hmmm. Come to think of it, there was that one who just… disappeared

  22. Cum in a bottle—with an eyedropper! What won’t they think of next? Reminds me of the story of two lesbians who used a turkey baster for something or other…

  23. When reading about the white gold powder, I came across the term, ‘Seed of Life Pendant.’ I wonder if that is anything like a pearl necklace.

  24. All of that for around 50 bucks? Sign me up. better yet, I’ll pass but I know others will buy into it.

  25. “…and the individual becomes a fifth dimensional being.” Like Marilyn McCoo.

  26. I love a good conspiracy theory.


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