gibble fisted

there are several theories as to why most of us are right handed, some are left handed and others are mixed handed which is not the same as being ambidextrous. I thought I was a definite right hander until I took the Edinburgh Handedness Test and noticed I’m left handed when it comes to opening boxes and lids.


and then I remembered something else. when it comes to playing with a penis I am ambidextrous with a slight preference for using my left hand.

New Scientist published a study indicating that lefties are more inhibited.  They also like to colour code things and write lists. I wonder if Rassles is a lefty…..

Neuropsychologist Chris McManus has been researching handedness for decades. He is one of the few scientists to achieve the rather bizarre accomplishment of receiving an Aventis Prize for Science Books and the infamous Ig Noble Prize from Harvard University, both in the same year. the Ig Noble was for a paper about the asymmetry of testicles.

“In most men the right testicle is higher (62.1% or 65.1% according to which survey one cites) and larger than the left, but few are aware that the average weights are 9.95g and 9.36g respectively and 9.69 and 9.10ccs in volume.”

Centuries ago it was believed that male seed came from the right testis and female from the left.

 Long after it was influencing how Greek sculptors saw the male body, men were being given extremely uncomfortable-sounding advice on conception. “As late as 1891, Mrs Ida Ellis in her Essentials of Conception  stated: ‘It is the male who can progenate a male or a female child at will, by putting an elastic band round the testicle not required’.”


Published in: on February 28, 2009 at 7:44 am  Comments (28)  

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  1. I had no idea that elastic bands could have such signiificant side effects. I thought they were just for fun.

  2. oh but they are. especially if you like that “tight testicle” feeling 🙂

  3. I wonder what happens if you put an elastic band around both? I’m guessing not much, ‘cos it’ll be a bit too uncomfortable to do anything after that.

  4. ? I require BOTH balls at all times.

  5. And the third testicle how much should that one weigh… or am I just special…

    I think I’m definitely a full righty.

  6. Steve: welcome to the gimcrack. I empathise with your stance 🙂

    Alex: three testicles? That sounds pretty hot to me

  7. Always carry a spare thats what I say!

  8. I’m forever writing lists … what does that make me? and what if the elastic goes ping?

  9. I write with my left hand. I draw with either hand. I can cast a fly rod with either hand. I play hockey right-handed only. I could never play tennis because my forehand is with my right hand and my backhand is with my left hand. This is handy for ping-pong, but I haven’t played ping-pong in years. When I play go, I always place my stones with my right hand, rarely my left. I only occasionally make lists.

    I thought left handed tennis players had an advantage – Jimmy Connors, John McEnroe, Martina Navratilova, Monica Seles, Nadal…..?

  10. Is “placing your stones” another term for “dressing,” as in “dressing on the left”?

  11. Sometimes I use my left hand for…well…you know. It makes me feel like I’m cheating on my right hand.

  12. Had shoulder surgery last fall on my right, dominant side- six weeks in a sling and forced to explore what I could get done with the left. Certain things such as fork handling, key handling and handling handling, which is also key, brought on such an er, swelling of pride with accomplishment after much practice. Live and learn! Oh yeah, I have 4.4 testicles (I love the internet).

    Paul Derdash

  13. Reminds me of that song…

    “Hitler, only had one ball….”

  14. My mother can write with both hands at the same time – the right hand from left to right, the left hand from right to left – in mirror image! It’s wild.

    Ian can you post a video of that some time?

  15. I like to think of myself as ambidextrous in the act of love. I also like to think of myself as many other things too… like an astronaut.

  16. I can write w/ both hands at the same time also–pretty cool…Not sure how the hubby would feel if I introduce elastic bands as part of our foreplay–Even if it doesn’t break removing it w/ all the hair would cause a potential problem. perhaps a scrunchy would work also…
    ummmm–?paul–4.4?? perhaps it just the swelling- I think you need to see someone about that–perhaps nursemyra–after all she is a nurse=)

  17. Why am I thinking of pawn broker signs? …….

  18. Spent some effort trying to learn to be more “left”. FAIL. Think it’s mostly born in ya – unless you lose your primary hand in a tractor accident or something…

  19. Hard wired righty here, although when I’ve taken art classes they had us draw with our non-dominant hand to rewire our brains to see things differently. Actually, I draw better with my left.

  20. From fists to hands to…You Know N.M no one can direct a conversation as well as you can.
    I am in awe.

  21. Thanks AM. A review site once called me a “schlong mong” but I like to think sometimes I at least start out talking about other body parts before I head south

  22. Tom Green has only one nut.

  23. The elastic band method is very amusing but not entirely accurate. If you use paperclips, however, you get much more consistent results (and, honestly, it’s more aesthetically pleasing as well).

    Ram are you pushing paper clips because you have a bigger markup on them than on rubber bands?

  24. Back to Alex L: Reminds me of the Cheech & Chong movie where Cheech Marin wore a t-shirt with UUU on the front. He was E.T., aka Eddie Torres, “The Extra Testicle.”

  25. Hi nurse – I’ll be back home this summer, so if she’s up for it, I’ll film her scribbling. 🙂

  26. great!!!

  27. I’m a right, actually. In a family of lefties. Is that weird? I think that’s weird.

  28. I’m a righty who makes mental lists. and yes, you are weird, but not because of your handedness 🙂

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