image by Manning

Androgynozoophilia is an uncomfortable subject and one that relates to fertility rituals in ancient Egypt.  Herodotus wrote about women having sex with trained goats in Mendesian temples. I think I’ll leave that alone as it’s making me queasy just thinking about it.


image from an anti smoking campaign

There is a famous story of geese that were trained for the erotic arousal of the Byzantine empress, Theodora. She supposedly tutored them in a stage performance where grains of barley were sprinkled on her genitals and the geese were then encouraged to feed upon them.


In more recent animal news the Courier Mail filed this report about a sexually aroused parrot who was caught attempting to seduce its owner’s feathered hat – while she was wearing it. The most my lesbian parrot does is nibble my earlobes. then again, I don’t wear elaborate concoctions on my head very often.


Published in: on June 21, 2009 at 7:14 am  Comments (31)  

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31 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Barley a la Empress-genitals may be th one thing thats good fer th goose but bettr fer th gandr.

  2. Very astute observation Joey

  3. The words ‘elaborate’ and ‘concoctions’ could easily be ‘double entendred’ …….. just sayin’ …..

  4. I stopped wearing elaborate concotions on my head too. Became too hard to zip my pants.

  5. I have a dog. I like to scratch him behind the ears. The end.

    Abe Propriate

  6. We Capricorns are a randy lot – – –

  7. the image of leda is beautiful.

  8. On its surface, a sexually aroused parrot attempting to seduce its owner’s feathered hat is no different than a dog trying to hump your leg. But it sure sounds more dignified.

  9. Sprinkling barley on the genitals is a rather hazardous idea. What if a grain finds its way into one of the crevices and decises to germinate?

  10. I thougt it was spposta be FUN to give a woman a goose.

    Now it sounds like all th FUN goes to th woman and th goose!

  11. I never thought of birds as erotic partners. I can’t get my mind around the beaks.

  12. So before people learned that if you put peanut butter on your junk dogs will lick it off, there was Theodora and her geese.

    It’s gotta be the wings.

  13. just the thought of the geese made me cross my legs

  14. My experience with geese? They’re kind of fucking mean. Like hell I’m hanging my cha cha out there at their mercy. No matter HOW desperate I get.

  15. So that’s where the expression “get your goat” came from…

  16. I have a Maine Coon cat who, before he received a transgender surgery, used to randomly hump my forearm, a habit I encouraged because my extensor muscles were fibrositic from full time massage work. The treading was truly delightful.

    However, the time he found only one exposed part of me on a cold night — the space between my eyebrows — and got down to work, I regretfully ejected him from the bed.

    • I’m sorry, but I just can’t figure out how those guys could ever think that having genitalia nibbled by a goose could be arousing. Well, unless you were some sort of masochist. Or get off on apprehension and fear. I mean, have you ever been bitten by a goose? They can seriously injure you!

      It takes all kinds, I guess.

    • Geez, I guess! The picture boggles the imagination.

  17. I’m going to send this to the PETA people who have been giving the fish vendors in Seattle a hard time.

    • AM don’t set PETA on me. Woody is plucking feathers at the moment, and also has completely bitten off all tail feathers. He/She looks like a ball of grey fluff with an enormous red head, it’s not a pretty sight

  18. Yes, the Leda and Zeus is very nice.

  19. How’d you get that woman to kiss Polanski on the lips?

  20. I wish i had a pet that would nibble more than just my earlobe 😦

    *sigh* I really need to get some….

  21. you could get a kitten and cover yourself in cream….

  22. Not sure whether goose is better than Andromimetophilia or gynemimetophilia.
    Till such time it’s not a gorilla, its safer.

  23. well I’ve heard that Johnny Depp and John Waters both own clown paintings by John Wayne Gacy. That’s pretty freaky too

  24. I’m disappointed in the whole Empress Theodora/goosing story. I thought she was classier than that. I would have expected her to use peacocks, or Chinese fancy pheasants, or swans, or something. Geese? Clearly she was reverting to her lowly origins.

  25. Somehow I think I could have done without the goose image.

  26. You understand nothing about pre-partriarch shamanics… Theadora and the Goat meant that her first level shape shifting soul was a goat and she could roam… i have one apprentice with a goal, most of my apprentices have small birds as their 1st of 3 levels of the higher soul

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