the butler had a peek

Maurice O’Regan was a handsome Irishman who was employed as butler, chauffeur and valet to the Fourth Baronet of Rousdon, Sir Francis Henry Grenville Peek. Sir Francis had a much younger beautiful raven-haired wife. You can see where this is going can’t you?

another handsome Irishman

On trial in the Old Bailey Maurice O’Regan, 33, was charged with forging three checks to a total of $34,400.

Part of the trouble was that Sir Francis (family crest, according to Debrett’s, “two hazel nuts slipped proper“; family motto, “Le Maitre Vient”) frequently went on extended trips attending to his real estate business. That left Lady Peek alone with the butler.  Maurice, who was paid only $36 a week, testified that Lady Peek began giving him money “to buy shirts.”

Peek family crest

Sure enough, while Maurice was trying on a particular shirt, “her ladyship ran her hand up and down my back.”

Thereafter, Maurice testified, they had intercourse seven times in six months. Then sadly came the end of what he called “a good wicket.” The Peeks decided to move to Spain’s Costa del Sol. “At first I understood I was going with them, but later I learned that this was not to be.”

Sand sculpture at Costa del Sol

Lady Caroline, according to the butler, soothed him with three blank checks and told him to fill them in for no more than $36,000—which he obeyed to the letter.  Asked why he had been given such a sum by his mistress, the gentleman’s gentleman presumed that “it was payment for services rendered . . .”

I wouldn’t mind hiring Gerard Butler’s services

Considerably embarrassed, Lady Peek took the stand to deny categorically all of Maurice’s statements. She insisted that the blank checks were meant to pay household bills. But her performance was less than convincing, and the judge instructed the all-male jury that her evidence was “not to be relied on.” With that the jurors after 65 minutes declared Maurice not guilty, and the court apologized for the eight months he had been held in jail. “So much for British aristocracy,” huffed the butler as he left court. “I’m finished with them.”

Princess Margaret circa 1934

Published in: on May 10, 2010 at 8:19 am  Comments (35)  
Tags: ,

The URI to TrackBack this entry is:

RSS feed for comments on this post.

35 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Let’s leave the way clear for plenty of peek-a-boo punning, but it does occur to me that Lord Peek didn’t realise his wife was at hers. A few hot months in Spain would fix that, no doubt.

    • If you’re going to introduce hired help to the household, I think it’s best to employ the oldest least attractive applicant possible. Just ask Posh Spice and Robyn Williams’ ex wife…..

      • Hmmm….that leaves the3 way open to me!

      • Hmmm….that leaves the way open to me!

  2. Nice eyecandy for a Monday morning! Thank you….

    • Who do you prefer Laura – Gerard or Jonathon? Jon has that marvellous mouth but I think Gerard is more my style. Love a man in t-shirt and jeans

      • Jon is too delicate looking for me. I find the thought of Gerard in a pair of tight jeans quite tantalizing! I’m a sucker for nice, quality oxford cloth shirts, button down collar with a pair of jeans..!

  3. I’m enjoying the eyecandy too – thanks

    (‘two hazelnuts slipped proper????’)

    • Is that gobbledygook to you too Lulu? Damn! I thought someone English would be able to explain it to me….

  4. No more than $36,000. Wonder what he wrote them for…hmmm.

  5. $12,000 on hair products, $12,000 on facials and $12,000 on Calvin Klein underwear. That’s my guess anyway. What’s yours?

    • Well if it is Jonathon Reyse(sp?) Myers I would say chest wax.

  6. Don’t suppose we could get a decko at the beautiful, raven haired one could we? Preferably in something low cut and see through – or both. Oooo suddenly my spangly shorts are all a tingle!!!!!!!!

    • I couldn’t find a photo of her…. 🙂

  7. Seven times, six months- apparently not much practice was needed. That sounds like quite a bit of restraint but it really bumps up his hourly earnings.

    Job Dunrite

  8. Over a month in jail for each instance of intercourse. . .

    • haha… that’s a good way of looking at it synchy

  9. Why in the world would you hire a young, attractive butler when you have a young, attractive wife and you yourself are neither young nor attractive?

    I love that photo of Princess Margaret.

  10. A good wicket? Cricket may be slow, but that comparison is just out and out ridiculous.

  11. getting laid just a bit more than once a month and paying for it? oh, those irish boyz…

  12. $34,400 is a lot in 2010. Can you imagine what it was then!?

    My policy on the help is: no hot babysitters. If there’s ever a “problem,” nobody will ever believe me.

  13. Two hazelnuts slipped proper… the mind boggles!

  14. Seven times in six months, but they neglect to mention how long each of those times were…

  15. Certainly prefer Gerard Butler. And reminds me to employ a man who does. One can always use them around the home.

  16. Mmm… Gerard Butler.

    Wonder where I can hire a butler. Or a gardener. Or a pool boy for my non-existent pool….

  17. my teen is totally in love with Gerard B (must confess to a weakening of the knees too 😉 )

  18. Jonathan is definitely the one for me. I like them slim and slightly dangerous.

    • I like them slim and VERY dangerous queenie. Hopefully The King doesn’t fall into all 3 of those categories (I know he fits 2) or there could be trouble during our upcoming French sojourn 😉

  19. Hey I would take $36 for sex, who wants to hire me!

  20. Seven times at $15,428.57 per, plus shirts? “Handsome” doesn’t begin to describe him!

  21. Jonathan AND Gerard. Can I have both. At the same time. Please.

  22. Judging by the hilt, that’s quite a sword he’s hiding there. Judging that he’s Irish; maybe not. Wait – I’m Irish! Damn foot-in-mouth disease . . .

  23. Good for him! I could use 36K myself.

  24. I wouldn’t spit on Gerard Butler either …unless he asked me to of course 😉 Oops – not showing my angelic side much today. Yes – slipped proper hazlenuts. I must’ve been away from the English language for far too long!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: